Thank You, Indianapolis.

Last August, I had the privilege of being the emcee for an event that churches in my area worked on putting together. The event was called "Faith, Family, and Football". The event was centered around a very special guest, Josh Bleill. Josh is a double amputee veteran of the War in Iraq, he now works for the Indianapolis Colts as a community/motivational/inspirational speaker. 
Here's a photo of Josh and I.

Josh speaks to crowds varying in size from a classroom of first graders to a few thousand people in auditoriums. He delivers a message of hope, perseverance, and working hard to get back on your feet after you've been knocked down. You can check out his book "One Step at a Time" here, I enjoyed reading it.

Some folks from my church had seen him speak before and they were very moved by his story. So, they felt called to put together an event in our neck of the woods featuring Josh as the speaker.

The event was awesome. We had wonderful musical acts, another special guest speaker, and a color guard. I believe there were roughly 1,000 people in attendance. Josh delivered a wonderful speech that night, and we were all very thankful to have heard it.

I really enjoyed meeting Josh and spending time with him.

As you can imagine, in the days and weeks following the accident, I remembered Josh's story as I found myself taking life one step at a time.

To be honest, I'm still taking life one step at a time most days.

Something else also happened in the days and weeks following the accident. A member of my congregation wrote to Josh. She felt that Josh and I had made a good connection and she was compelled to let him know what happened. If anything, so that he could keep us all in his prayers. Josh's secretary wrote back to say that Josh was very sorry to hear the news, that we would be in his prayers, and he wanted my address.

Unrelated to Josh, the event, or my church, a good friend of mine reached out to the Colts. He wanted to let them know that a big fan had suffered a big loss in their life, so he wrote to them.

I'm unaware of when either letter was sent. Nor, did I know they were even written. But on January 23rd, I came home to a package from Colts Headquarters, and this letter was included.

Needless to say, I was floored.

I had my suspicions about how this very special letter came to be, so I called the member of my congregation to ask if she knew anything about it. She then told me her story.

After texting the image to my friends, my friend let me know that he had written the Colts as well.

Y'all sure know how to make a guy feel loved.

But, let's talk about that letter.

Wow, just wow.

I don't know who wrote the letter, as you can see it's not signed by any individual. I don't know if Josh wrote it, if a chaplain wrote it, or Hell, maybe Jim Irsay wrote it.

I don't know who wrote it, but I'm so thankful for their thoughtful words.

Let's be honest, this not a form letter. This was not an "auto-reply". Someone took their time. This came from the heart.

I still choke up more often than not when I read the letter. 

I'd like to highlight two lines in particular.

1- "We pray you will continue to have the strength to focus on the vision you and Tiffany had for your lives together."

I think about this a lot. On my hardest days, I try to remember the vision that we had for life. That vision included my completion of seminary and continuing to serve my two congregations. That vision is still alive, that vision I can continue. I celebrate that vision.

But, there's also a vision I can't continue. The vision of our lives together, the vision of having children, the vision of growing old together. I grieve the loss of that vision.

However, a colleague pointed out that perhaps I could honor that vision by one day remarrying and having children. (No time soon, of course.) It would not be the vision of Tiffany and I, but it would honor the vision we had together. If Tiffany loved me and believed in me enough to share life and children with me, then perhaps I can honor that vision by becoming the husband and father she knew I could be. It's a heavy, daunting thought and I'm still navigating it. Difficult as it may be, I'm glad he brought it to my attention.

2- "We hope that the qualities you admire most in Tiffany will live on in you and the world will be better for it."

After reading this, I feel like I need to recite the words from the Affirmation of Baptism, "I will, and I ask God to help and guide me."

Oh, that I could live out the qualities of my better half.

On the one hand, so much of me was her and so much of her was me. We fit together like a hand in a glove.

But, on the other hand. She was the most empathetic, caring, and genuinely loving person that I've ever known. And, even on my best days, I could never come close to filling her shoes.

But, God help me, I will try to do the best I can. She made the world a better place, she carried the love of God everywhere she went.

I could never begin to fill all the voids caused by her absence. I can only try to be a reflection of her love, which itself was a reflection of God's love.

The letter, and the thought and care that went into it's manifestation mean so much to me. I had the letter framed and I've placed it where I can see it everyday.

I don't read it everyday, but I know it's always there. It's always working to motivate and encourage me.

And for that, I could not be more grateful.

Thank you, Carol and Brian.
Thank you, Josh Bleill.
Thank you, Indianapolis Colts.

Grace, mercy, and peace to you all,
Robert